actual words spoken (only in Haiti), edition #2

Don't make eye contact with the policemen.

Check to make sure there aren't any riots going on today before we head to the grocery store.

I really wish that dog would get run over.

You can eat it, but don't come crying to me when you get sick.

We need to replace the batteries in the take-a-dump fan.

Said by Jeremiah: Look at the size of her avocado's...

Stop freaking out about the rat, he isn't going anywhere and he isn't going to eat you.