You won't read this in any of the adoption or attachment books and while I certainly would never give the advice of using a major medical event as a help in strengthening attachment bonds between an adoptive child and the adoptive family, I will gladly welcome the leaps and bounds we made in our attachment to each other over the last few weeks. For the very first time in our year together I saw Eli really trust me. I saw him choose to allow me to administer comfort. And a small part of me rejoiced when he would want me to give him the medicine and reject the nurses attempts. He saw me as his Mom...protector and comforter and allowed himself the vulnerability to receive it from me.
We also got nine whole days together where he was the focus of my world. That never hurts anything.
He also made significant grounds in his potty training over the last 6 weeks. I was expecting regression in this area...but instead, he had moved to no pull ups during naps and rarely has an overnight accident. I am a lazy wimp who still refuses to chance not putting on a pull up at night. As much fun as it is to try and change sheets at 3am and all.
And finally...this one really wasn't unintended, because it was one of the major reasons we did the surgery: Eli can now wear a bike helmet properly! We bought him one last week and he loves it so much he rarely takes it off, ha!
Reaching the 6 week mark at the end of this week means two major things. 1) He can swim again!!! This has seriously been the hardest part of his recovery after the hospital stay. He is very very very excited to be able to go swimming this weekend! 2) I can stop my internal panic attacks whenever I see him and Ezra wrestling. While we still need to be careful for any major bumps and falls...we have safely moved past the critical six week mark!
I cannot even put into words how happy I am to be on this side of his surgery. I am so amazed at the Lord's faithfulness to us throughout it all. And then to be blessed with all these bonus points is just amazing. Absolutely amazing.
3 comments:
That is great! I am so glad you guys are post surgery and everything is going great! :-) Makes me smile!
I totally agree about having a medcially needy child and going thru surgery or care for them is a huge benefit to adopting a special needs child and attachment issues. It has been one of the most positive parts of all of our special needs adoptions...more families should be encouraged by this to adopt or consider a special needs child...You will be blessed.I love his beautiful smile and I am so glad he is able to swim now.
I am a lurker who found your blog through a friend, but I have a 10 year old daughter we adopted through foster care when she was almost 6. She had to have her tonsils and adenoids out about 6 months after placement and we experienced the same thing - you would never WANT them to have medical issues but it is such an awesome step in attachment and bonding! She still talks about all the snuggling we did when she was recovering (she has ADHD so she's not usually still enough for snuggling, lol!). So glad Eli is doing so well! :)
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