(my) motley crew

Mot-ley
[mot-lee]
adjective, noun

1. exhibiting great diversity of elements.
2. being of different colors combined
3. the parti colored garment of a jester.
4. a medly.




































A terrible picture. But one that makes me laugh because of the following:

1) Eli's shoes are on the wrong feet
2) Ezra's shoes (worn with socks no less) are on the wrong feet
3) Eli's pants are backwards
4) Eli's underwear (I would find this one out later) are backwards
5) Ella is wearing socks with her sandals. With the heels pulled up to mid calf.
6) Eli has yogurt in his hair
7) Ezra is wearing a monster truck pajama shirt that is a size too small and shows a peek of his belly button

Oh. They are a motley crew. But they are my motley crew.

And really. What kind of mother lets her kids go out like that?

Thursday Thoughts

Drip. Drip.

I think the rain (while much needed) washed away my energy, my motivation, my brain cells and most certainly my happy heart yesterday.

Ah. But today is a new day. With a promise of new mercies. (Lamentations 3:22-23)

I took Ezra for his three year old check up yesterday. Just him and me. Except that when you put him into an enclosed windowless doctors appointment room he morphs into the equivalent of 4.5 kids. I actually had to excuse myself in the middle of the appointment to take him to the bathroom to have "a talk."

Later in the day I heard him tell Ella about his doctors appointment:
"They put stickers in my hair and hiccups in my mouth. Then they cut the hiccups out."

Yeah. Not sure how he got that.

My hard drive crashed on my computer yesterday. The day after my husband had backed up all my pictures. Shew. That was a close one. And while all pictures are pretty much irreplaceable, I'd have been physically sick had we lost all our ethiopia ones. I am now especially motivated to get working on Eli's lifebook and get some of those photos into an album for him. Any of you adoptive moms reading this, any suggestions for how to do a lifebook is much appreciated!

As of last night I am now officially caught up on all my coupons.

Tomorrow starts the first day of October. And my weatherman crush tells me that colder weather is coming along with it. Bring it. I've had the kids hoodies ready for weeks.

The kids have a new morning tradition where as soon as they get up they all climb into Eli's bed with him. There are a lot of squeals and laughs and happy noises (and a good share of not so happy noises too) and it is just so impossibly cute to see them all snuggled together. It's hard to believe that next week brings the three month mark of Eli joining our family.

Happy Thursday!

Hambrick House Rules

Ever since Eli came home I feel as though Jeremiah and I slipped into a sort of emergency mode in our parenting. Those early weeks were all about coping and struggling to find a new normal. And keeping Ezra from killing Eli. And getting more than two hours of consecutive sleep.

We were just reacting in our parenting.

As we approach the three month mark of Eli joining our family things are finally to the place where I was able to step back and be silent enough in my heart to allow the Holy Spirit room to convict me on this. Reactive parenting is not effective, it doesn't please God, it doesn't get to the heart of the behavior, and it frustrates the kids.

This weekend we sat down as a family and worked together to come up with some ground rules. Or Hambrick house rules as we call them. If you are in the Hambrick family then you are expected to live by these rules. Mommy and Daddy especially included.

1) Honor God
2) Obey Mom and Dad
3) Show Love
4) Be Self-Controlled
5) Be Grateful

These are prominently displayed in the house. Jeremiah wrote another silly song (Dan Zane eat your heart out) to help the kids remember them. We talked about the scriptures backing up these rules. And we laid out the consequences for breaking them.

At the risk of sounding overly simplistic...this is one of the best parenting decisions we have ever done. The kids seem to really get that these aren't just arbitrarily decided rules. The consequences are clear and take all the stress out of administering them...and help with my consistency. Which helps with their frustration. Which helps with my reactions. Which allows me the patience to talk about the heart of the issue.

Which is what parenting should be all about.
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What are some of your house rules?!

Memory Monday

Philippians 2:14

Do everything without complaining or arguing.

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That is a hard one. A really hard one.

I don't know if it is the not complaining part that is so hard.

Or the not arguing part.

Or maybe the everything part.

Yeah. The everything part. That's the really hard part for me.

Ella is a lot like me and she has been having some struggles with complaining and arguing as well. And really, our whole family could benefit from hiding this one in our hearts so Jeremiah wrote a simple song to help the kids learn it and we've found ample opportunity to practice it already.

Ample. Opportunity.

I also know that it is not enough just to say I am not going to complain or argue. I need to replace those things with new behavior. Therefore we created the very elaborate game, "The Grateful Game." Here's how it works:

1) I notice someone is complaining. Myself included.
2) I yell out "time for the grateful game!"
3) Whoever is in the room has to name one thing they are grateful for that moment.

Really complicated, I know. But it gets easier the more you play it. Give it a try.

wild animal sighting

There has been a wild animal roaming around our house the past week. I finally managed to capture it on camera in the backyard.

At first it was shy and didn't want to show its face...


































But I managed to bribe it with some promises of candy and it decided to smile for me...

























































Have you ever seen a cuter lion in the world? Seriously.

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Sidenote: Eli more than makes up for Ezra's refusal to wear anything remotely resembling a costume. Or hat. Or gloves. Or any form of accessory. Eli would sleep in this (or the spiderman costume!) if I let him.

Getting Back Into the "Swing" of Things

After almost two weeks off of school I decided to dub this week our getting back into the "swing" of things week for our home school. Because that is exactly what we were doing.

Swinging, that is.


























We have visited a new Durham park every day this week. And made a lot of observations, such as how many swings, slides, and picnic tables there were. Was it a busy or quiet park? What made it special? What was the weather like?

We wrote everything down in a journal and when the boys were sleeping (tired out from all that playing!) Ella and I made up a graph to input our information about each park. At the end of the week we compared all the parks and graphs and made one big giant graph combining some of the categories.

















Can I just say that this was the most fun week of school EVER! Really! Because I really was trying to get caught back up on so many other things it was great for me because it didn't require a lot of planning. Ella was very into it and can tell you exactly what a graphs purpose is, how to make one up, and how to read a basic one. Her number writing skills got a lot of practice as well as her basic adding and subtracting skills. Ezra and Eli...well, they just had fun!

Thursday Thoughts

Have you ever thought about how different types of cheese are credited to different countries. For us as Americans...our cheese is unnaturally orange, covered in plastic, and contains the least amount of nutritional value of all the cheeses. What does that say about us as Americans?

Yep. It's gonna be a random one today.

It was absolutely blissful all week being home. I am feeling caught up on laundry and grocery shopping and meal planning and bill paying and check book balancing and post office running and doctors appointment making, and home school schooling. The coupon cutting and organizing...not so much.

Eli had his appointment with the Duke cranio-facial surgeon this morning. (Thank you Sheri for letting Ella and Ezra come play!)We have a lot to think about and decide on in the next few weeks. Our next step is to meet with a Duke social worker to talk through the implications of surgery on Eli and the best way to prepare him (and all of us) for it. Then another appointment with the surgeon. Then we will probably go ahead and schedule the surgery. As those who know me well know...I don't handle sickness and medical issues very well. It is my Achilles heel if you will. It is a good thing I have Jeremiah because he is awesome about those things. Surprise reason # 72 why I am glad I married him. I know I will be stretched and that the Lord will be equipping and sustaining me to get through this.

I made a discovery this week that just might revolutionize my life. Or at least the frustrations stemming from Ezra and his shoes. You see, Ezra has gotten really particular about his feet. Really particular. He will only wear crocs (happily) but would get frustrated numerous (very numerous) times when a little rock or piece of mulch or dirt or leaf or stick would get into this shoe. Seeing how his shoe of choice is one with holes in it...this was a major problem for him. And consequently...a major problem for me. Therefore, I present the solution:


























Yes. I know he looks a little nerdy. But I am willing to sacrifice his vanity for my sanity. Or maybe my vanity for his sanity?

I am reading through the biography of Mother Teresa this week and was struck by the simplicity of this aphorism she used to write on the back of her "business cards":

The fruit of silence is prayer;
the fruit of prayer is faith;
the fruit of faith is love;
the fruit of love is service,
the fruit of service is peace.

This simple saying places silence as the departure point of prayer, faith, love, service, and ultimately peace. Yet Mother Teresa, who spent most of her life in large and overcrowded cities certainly didn't have an abundance of physical silence. She must have (obviously) learned to internally quiet her mind and heart.


Cheese.
Surgery.
Socks with crocs.
Mother Teresa.

I warned you it was going to be a random one.

Happy Thursday!

milestone moments

As Ella and Ezra grew from tiny little babies into crawling exploring toddlers and into the inquiring and opinionated preschoolers they are today...their milestones were pretty obvious: sitting up, crawling, eating solid food, cruising, first words, walking, etc.

With a newly adopted child I am learning that there is a whole new spectrum of milestones worth celebrating. Milestones slightly less obvious...but milestones none the less.

• Eli came to me a week ago and told me he wanted to eat breakfast. Not by whining or pointing. But by walking over to me and saying, "Mom, Eli eat."

• For the first time ever he walked through the church with me last Sunday, holding my hand, and waving hi and flashing his winning smile to everyone that passed him. A far cry from the quiet, unsmiling, little guy who just gave stares to new people.
  

• While sitting on the couch downstairs this week Eli climbed up next to me and shyly slid his arms around my neck. His first attempt at initiating a hug. Unasked for by me.

• He fell while riding his bike down the driveway and scraped his knee and came running to me crying. The first time he has brought his boo-boo to me. The first scar I could identify.

Simple moments. Easily overlooked. But monumental moments worthy of noting.

one two three

I am one mom.

To two three year old boys.
























I am popping out phrases like "no, you can't flush your _______ down the toilet" or "you cannot ride your blanket down the stairs backwards" or "books are for reading not for frisbee throwing" or "if you can't keep your hands to yourself I am going to duct tape them to your sides" left and right these days.

Kidding about the duct tape part.

Maybe?

But goodness the fun they bring to this house. To my life. I love it.

I was never one of these girls that said they wanted twins. I always knew that would be a lot of work. But now that I have virtual twins I am thinking it is really not that bad. Eli has caught up in height to Ezra and they both wear the same size clothes. They both are about the same stage of potty training. Their personalities couldn't be more different...but, hey, that would just be boring if they agreed on everything. (ha!)

Yes, it is a lot of work. But goodness the fun they bring to this house. To my life. I love it.

I know the difference between a tanker truck and a flat bed truck and a front end loader and a bulldozer. I know the names of all the Disney car personalities and can quote whole sections of the movie without thinking. I hear shouts of "bus!", "truck!", "motorcycle!" as we drive all over town. I hear arguments of Ezra correcting Eli on exactly what kind of truck it is. I get numerous "choke hugs" a day and have been known to contemplate buying a helmet for protection. For me. Not them. I hear laughs after burps and poots all day long. Of which they seem to have been loaded with two times the amount more than Ella.

I am constantly reminding myself that we are raising them up to be men. Not two bigger boys.

Yes, it is a lot of responsibility. But goodness the fun they bring to this house. To my life. I love it.

Not Me Monday (Just Say No)

I did not take this picture.

Because I am not a mean momma who is stocking my arsenal of blackmail photos for the future teenage years.























Nope. Not me.

Thursday Thoughts (on friday)

We head home tomorrow.

Sniff. Sniff.

It's been such a great week. The weather has been perfect. The kids have been (not perfect) but oh so much fun.

Some favorite moments of this week:

Watching Eli's face when he first saw the ocean.
Flying a kite.
Watching Ella ride her first wave in on the boogie board.
Playing monopoly at the pool.
Outer Banks aquarium.
Hearing Ezra squeal like a girl when he opened his "car fresent".
Coffee and quiet times on the hammock overlooking the ocean.
Gaining fresh understanding of Psalm 46:10.















I am, however, such a creature of habit though that no matter how wonderful a vacation is I will be ready to get home and finally stay home. Our whirlwind weeks of weddings and vacation are over and it is time to settle into a routine again. Oh yeah, and that little thing called school with Ella too.

I feel like we are saying goodbye to summer as we head home...

And, goodness, what a summer it has been for us!

Happy Thursday (on Friday)!

swiftly fly the years

Somehow I blinked...

and my baby boy turns three years old today.
























































































































He is such a blessing.

A dimple wearing, car playing, boundaries testing, bundle of energy blessing.

Despite all of these kind of moments (and maybe because of them!) I absolutely love being his Momma.

Happy Birthday our sweet (and sometimes spicy) Ezra James!

Beach Week: Photo(s) of the Day

We made it to the beach yesterday.

Ahh...

As soon as I could smell the salty air I could feel myself settle down.

And it has just been an incredible relaxing day today. The beach in September is absolutely perfect. Especially if you can time it in between hurricanes.

Eli's eyes got even bigger when he first saw the ocean. A priceless memory. The other two were positively giddy to get on the beach. And the pool. And play with their cousins.

White Momma Moment

When choosing a donut for my brown skinned child I have learned that a white powdered sugar donut is not a good idea.

This was his first bite.



Yeah.

You can imagine what he looked like at the end.

Not Me Monday (the ezra edition)

I did not lose Ezra at the rehearsal dinner this weekend.

Therefore, I did not find him shut inside the elevator...calling the fire department.

And I did not hear his sweet little voice answer "umm...yes" when the fireman on the elevator phone asked if he was stuck inside.

While I was standing outside.

Nope. Not me.

And definitely not Ezra.

shocker

We are home from wedding round two and I must shockingly confess that I did not take one single picture the whole trip. That will tell you how busy the past two days have been!

Busy, but oh so fun.

And don't worry all my photo friends out there...Kelly took some incredible ones that I am sure will be making their appearance one of these days.

All thirteen (yes, I wrote 13!) grandkids (with the oldest one being five years old!) helped as flower girls and ring bearers...and goodness were they ever cute! Ella did great all the way down the aisle and for the first 10 minutes of the ceremony. Then she "got shy" because "everyone was smiling at me" and left to go play. Ezra and Eli both pulled a wagon with the four littlest ones in them. Ezra did great...up until he ran into the stage steps and busted his mouth. Good thing he had a hovering Momma to rush in and rescue him. Eli did great. So great that we had a near tantrum moment at the end when he ran out of runway.

Shew. That's a lot of pressure on a mommy =)

Now I've got less than 24 hours to unpack, repack, and get ready for beach week!

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My beach bums from last year:

Thursday Thoughts (of the thankful variety)

I am thankful today for a husband who always makes sure the kids fingernails are cut.

I am thankful today that the God of Peace has promised to guard my heart and mind (not my circumstances) when I bring my requests before him with thanksgiving.

I am thankful that this potty training thing with Ezra has been really (dare I say it?) easy. He is doing awesome!

I am thankful for the cartoon Umizoomi. And Max and Ruby. The only two cartoons that all three of my kids will watch. For at least 10 minutes.

I am thankful that as long as we all eat together my kids (or my husband) do not care if we eat steak or cereal. Which is a very good thing this week.

I am thankful that my, ahem...undergarment...from my wedding still fits to wear under my dress this weekend.

I am thankful for urgent care and trusting my instincts to take Ezra and catching an upper respiratory infection and double ear infection early. And antibiotics. And insurance.

I am thankful that Eli likes to cuddle. At least I still have one left.

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We leave for wedding round two as we trek to Virginia this morning. Fun. Fun.

Sidenote: With all the crazy traveling schedule we've been doing I just thought I would note that Eli is doing awesome! He is transitioning well in each new environment and has been warming up quickly (but not too quickly) to new people. And the best part of traveling with him is the coming home part and seeing his face light up as he realizes that he is home.

Happy Thursday!

What's In a Birthday? (a call for advice)

As is not uncommon in the world of international adoption Eli has had three different dates of birth recorded for him:

The first we heard about was December 14, 2006 - The date he was admitted to Layla Orphanage, since they didn't have any official birthday.

The second was November 10, 2006 - The "official" birth date as deemed by the court officials in Ethiopia and recorded on his new Ethiopian birth certificate. Really, it was just sort of arbitrarily given since the December birth date obviously wasn't the real one.

The third is March 22, 2007 - The real birth date as told to us by Eli's birth mom...told to us with such quickness and clarity that I have no doubt that this is the real one.

No big deal...right?

Wrong.

Unfortunately, it is a big deal. Without boring you with a bunch of technical jargon...basically we can change his birth date to the correct one when we do his readoption...but I have heard from numerous sources that we can run into problems with the new North Carolina birth certificate not matching his Ethiopian birth certificate. You know...little things like not being able to get a passport for him.

So. We are not sure if it is worth changing? But that has Eli turning four very soon. And he is not a four year old in any way, shape, or form. Do we just keep it on paper and celebrate his real one in March? Does that create its own set of problems in and of itself?

Sigh.

All that rambling to say that I'd love any advice from any other adoptive families (or just about anyone with an opinion on the matter). Because the government websites are just oh so freakin' helpful about these matters.

just one

of the million and one...
reasons...



































i love him.

in one of the rare moments during m&ms wedding where he didn't have to keep an eye out on our three little ones...he helps out my sister and picks up my little niece Maddy.

yep. he's a keeper.

photojournal: m&m's wedding