Reason #3 Why I am going to be more careful telling my children "good job"...

3) I don't want them to lose interest

"Good painting!" may get children to keep painting for as long as we keep watching and praising. But, warns Lilian Katz, an early childhood educator "once attention is withdrawn, many kids won’t touch the activity again." Now the point isn’t to draw, to read, to think, to create – the point is to get the goody, whether it’s an ice cream, a sticker, or a "Good job!

These actions come to be seen not as something valuable and fun in their own right but as something they had to do to get that reaction again from an adult.

1 comments:

Jessie said...

I respectfully disagree with this aspect of the theory, though I did enjoy the last one about letting them say "I did it" before you tell them they did it.

I disagree on this one because as a child my teachers told me that I wrote very clever stories, I had many teachers from elementary through high school tell me this, and today I am an author. If nobody ever tells you you're good at something, maybe you'd never have the guts to do it. If little Timmy is painting a super picture of a penguin, I say it's fine to compliment it. You dont know! Timmy could be a budding artist, showing you the very beginnings of what could be his career in the animation or graphic art industry.

But on the other hand, general scribble or finger painting is fun, and doesnt mean that Timmy is the next Picasso. My point is that if a child is doing an extraordinary job at something that they seem truly talented at, I see no problem with passing them a compliment or two. We all need compliments, it's not always about busy work.

Love these, keep them coming.

 

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