I did not eat dog food as a kid.
I did not allow my children to eat whatever they wanted for dinner last night.
They did not choose donuts, popcorn, and strawberries.
I do not have to ask Ezra if he has underwear on every time we leave the house.
I did not lose a child at the grocery store today.
I did not find that child gorging on the watermelon samples after a panicked search. (And I'll bet you can't guess which child it was, ha!)
I did not have a child walk in on my husband and me while we were "talking about Christmas" ...if you catch my drift.
Nope. None of these things happened. Not to me.