Growing Pains

By | 4:34 PM 3 comments
Ella totally schooled me in memory this week.
So not cool.
I feel old.

I can't get used to her new hair cut.
Every time I look at her I see this big girl (like maybe seven whole years old).
Where did my baby go?
My first tiny baby?

I remember crying on the delivery table right before I had Ezra. Crying because I knew my love would never be singular for her again. It would always be divided with Ezra.

Of course, looking back, I realize how silly that was. But it wasn't silly at the moment.

I cried today as I watched Ezra line up his cars across the living room. His little world as he knows is about to be over. I know that his little world is about to be (ultimately) better...but I still cried. Still mourned. It is part of the process of life. A new chapter is about to begin...and that means one has to end.

Yes, I will probably look back and think, how silly. But it doesn't feel silly at this moment.
Newer Post Older Post Home


Keesha Via said...

Girl, I completely understand the whole crying thing. I absolutely could not grasp how I could love another child like I had Ilijah. Then came Bella, and she melts my heart just as much. Can't wait to see what I do with my third as well.

Becky Swann said...

I think it's good you are feeling each stage, crying for the last stage makes it easier to accept the next
I am so excited for your next stage!
love her new haircut!

DeeDee said...

I love your honesty Jen....and your obvious close walk with the Lord. I love Ella's new do....she is a sweetheart just like her momma....and I love Eli's tender eyes. What gifts you have been given. I will be praying for you as you begin to end your journey to bring your son home!